Help I'm sooo confused :(?

oook.. wel a coupple of months ago my bfs friend hung himself i went tru a reali bad time had sucide toughts lik evry minute of the day i cut myself and turned to drink i drank 2 much ended up in hospital for 2 nyts and if my best friend did call my dad wen she did i wudnt b ere wel i got reali close to this guy my best best friend ringin everynyt on the fone for 7 hours one nyt he tried pressurinfg me into goin wiv him but i only saw him as a friend wel latly hes reali reali gotten to like me kind of obsessed nd i feel lik i cnt lik another person cuz of him i only see him as a friend and ive told him time and time again i love the fact tat hes the only one hus kept me saine goin tru the hard times i really lik his best friend and i dno if i should tel m or not ive bun txtn him and he was flirtin bac and kinda sed he liked me but nothin cud happen cuz of my oda best friend i dno if i should tell the both of them that i av feelins for the oda guy or not im afraid it myt ruin everytin